Ontlatpon is a god.

She takes the form of a two thousand metre long, amazing ferret.

Ontlatpon created the Sombrero Galaxy six billion years ago.

If you believe in Ontlatpon, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Ontlatpon, she will refuse to believe in you.

Ontlatpon's most sacred site is Pontelandolfo in Italy.

Ontlatpon's Holy Commandments

1. Never bounce in holy places.

2. Do not eat turnips.

3. Respect your elders.

4. Do not sing in public.

5. Do not fashion models of living things.