Arnluncun Cudbetomt is a god.

He takes the form of a giant, amazing aardvark.

Arnluncun Cudbetomt created an electron six million years ago.

If you believe in Arnluncun Cudbetomt, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Arnluncun Cudbetomt, he will send you a strongly worded letter.

Arnluncun Cudbetomt's most sacred site is Wukan in China.

Arnluncun Cudbetomt's Holy Commandments

1. Do not covet oxen.

2. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

3. Hide if five manatees approach from the west.

4. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Arnluncun Cudbetomt.

5. Never write about horizontal gene transfer.