Vegmotlim is a god.

He takes the form of a chunky, humorless unicorn.

Vegmotlim created an atom seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Vegmotlim, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Vegmotlim, he will destroy your favourite planet.

Vegmotlim's most sacred site is Úbeda in Spain.

Vegmotlim's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no porpoises in a building before entering it.

2. Always take life seriously.

3. Never run in the presence of whales.

4. You must pray to Vegmotlim nine times a day.

5. Always make a point of helping unfortunate snails.