Jabjadstrag is a god.

She takes the form of a very heavy, merciless meerkat.

Jabjadstrag created matter four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Jabjadstrag, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Jabjadstrag, she will turn you into a giant slug.

Jabjadstrag's most sacred site is Vestfold in Norway.

Jabjadstrag's Holy Commandments

1. Never look in ponds.

2. Do not kill mice.

3. Monkeys are unholy and should not be approached.

4. Always treat capybaras with great respect.

5. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.