Gumkomzog is a god.

It takes the form of a planet-sized, two-faced meerkat.

Gumkomzog created the planet Jupiter five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gumkomzog, it will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Gumkomzog, it will curse you with boils.

Gumkomzog's most sacred site is Embalam in India.

Gumkomzog's Holy Commandments

1. Gumkomzog loves horses, so they must be honoured.

2. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

4. Never hurt grasshopers.

5. Erect a large aluminium sculpture of Gumkomzog on top of all buildings.