Lamflanmat is a god.

He takes the form of an one thousand metre long, deceitful yak.

Lamflanmat created the world three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Lamflanmat, he will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Lamflanmat, he will curse you with boils.

Lamflanmat's most sacred site is Úbeda in Spain.

Lamflanmat's Holy Commandments

1. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Lamflanmat.

2. Never wear mauve corsets.

3. Never look at asteroids.

4. Do not drink water in green rooms.

5. Always help sick manatees.