Kenmabpang Toflabben is a god.

It takes the form of a rotund, unselfish elephant.

Kenmabpang Toflabben created dark matter eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Kenmabpang Toflabben, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Kenmabpang Toflabben, it will strike you with lightening.

Kenmabpang Toflabben's most sacred site is Pontelandolfo in Italy.

Kenmabpang Toflabben's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large carbon sculpture of Kenmabpang Toflabben on top of all buildings.

2. Never play with disobedient children.

3. Always help gulls in need.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate geese.

5. Moths are not to be trusted.