Vidxemhudrut is a god.

He takes the form of a thin, idiotic yak.

Vidxemhudrut created everything that exists seven million years ago.

If you believe in Vidxemhudrut, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Vidxemhudrut, he will turn you into a giant slug.

Vidxemhudrut's most sacred site is Olmarch in Wales.

Vidxemhudrut's Holy Commandments

1. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

2. Always make a point of helping unfortunate dolphins.

3. Do not make images of living things.

4. Never hurt cats.

5. Never eat lemons.