Wonnillbif is a god.

She takes the form of a minute, selfish swan.

Wonnillbif created a strange quark eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Wonnillbif, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Wonnillbif, she will send two she bears to sort you out.

Wonnillbif's most sacred site is Amrit in Egypt.

Wonnillbif's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about black holes.

2. Never think about evolution by means of natural selection.

3. Run away if four eagles approach from the north.

4. Do not kill porpoises.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.