Hasdubarmgess is a god.

She takes the form of an enormous, astonishing parrot.

Hasdubarmgess created tapeworms three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Hasdubarmgess, she will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Hasdubarmgess, she will turn you into a slug.

Hasdubarmgess' most sacred site is Troqueer in Scotland.

Hasdubarmgess' Holy Commandments

1. Always stare at clouds.

2. Never talk about capybaras.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

4. Never write about the strong nuclear force.

5. Never eat bark.