Nellmotlun is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely thin, narcissistic elephant.

Nellmotlun created everything that exists four years ago.

If you believe in Nellmotlun, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Nellmotlun, he will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Nellmotlun's most sacred site is Estedt in Germany.

Nellmotlun's Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair turquoise.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate birds.

3. Always help horses in need.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.