Ruttmadflagpon is a god.

She takes the form of a small, unsympathetic narwhal.

Ruttmadflagpon created the Whirlpool Galaxy five billion years ago.

If you believe in Ruttmadflagpon, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Ruttmadflagpon, she will send two she bears to sort you out.

Ruttmadflagpon's most sacred site is Denshawai in Egypt.

Ruttmadflagpon's Holy Commandments

1. Do not covet oxen.

2. Do not listen to music.

3. Never look at stars.

4. Always obey Ruttmadflagpon's priests.

5. Do not fashion models of living things.