Jipkopbop is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely heavy, emotional snake.

Jipkopbop created a quark six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Jipkopbop, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Jipkopbop, she will say rude things about you at parties.

Jipkopbop's most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Jipkopbop's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least five thousand metres per day.

2. Do not drink water in gray rooms.

3. Always stare at clouds.

4. You must never eat aubergines.

5. Never write about amino acids.