Kensasvonk is a god.

She takes the form of a large, staggering camel.

Kensasvonk created a bottom quark three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Kensasvonk, she will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Kensasvonk, she will torture you forever.

Kensasvonk's most sacred site is Utti in Finland.

Kensasvonk's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate whales.

2. Never think ill of sick monkeys.

3. Never mention snails.

4. Always make sure there are no goats in a room before entering it.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.