Gemrowciss is a god.

She takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, awe-inspiring jackal.

Gemrowciss created the solar system two million years ago.

If you believe in Gemrowciss, she will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Gemrowciss, she will turn you into a hamster.

Gemrowciss' most sacred site is Xaaga in Mexico.

Gemrowciss' Holy Commandments

1. Never eat corn.

2. Do not chop down trees.

3. Do not laugh in public.

4. Ducks are unholy and should not be approached.

5. Do not stand on grass.