Labgepflag is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly large, loving cow.

Labgepflag created an up quark five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Labgepflag, he will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Labgepflag, he will attempt to scare you with hail.

Labgepflag's most sacred site is Snipp in Sweden.

Labgepflag's Holy Commandments

1. Do not eat turnips.

2. Never wear stockings.

3. Never look in ponds.

4. Always look after injured whales.

5. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.