Quillpidtipquillsomkarbess is a god.

He takes the form of a blubbery, duplicitous raccoon.

Quillpidtipquillsomkarbess created viruses three million years ago.

If you believe in Quillpidtipquillsomkarbess, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Quillpidtipquillsomkarbess, he will throw large rocks at you.

Quillpidtipquillsomkarbess' most sacred site is Katteri in India.

Quillpidtipquillsomkarbess' Holy Commandments

1. Never write about nebulae.

2. Never think ill of sick mites.

3. Do not trade with those who eat aubergines.

4. Always help sick doves.

5. Worship no other gods but Quillpidtipquillsomkarbess.