Barnkoplab is a god.

It takes the form of a gargantuan, smart centaur.

Barnkoplab created Europe four billion years ago.

If you believe in Barnkoplab, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Barnkoplab, it will make you grow a tail.

Barnkoplab's most sacred site is Romlund in Denmark.

Barnkoplab's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your feet.

2. Never sit near whales.

3. Do not chop down trees.

4. Barnkoplab loves foxes, so they must be honoured.

5. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.