Jandobstafbopsogfum is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly fat, clever squirrel.

Jandobstafbopsogfum created Asia six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Jandobstafbopsogfum, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Jandobstafbopsogfum, he will cry a lot.

Jandobstafbopsogfum's most sacred site is Kottucherry in India.

Jandobstafbopsogfum's Holy Commandments

1. Jandobstafbopsogfum must be the most important thing in your life.

2. Hide if seven ants approach from the west.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate tapirs.

4. Never go into brown rooms.

5. Do not listen to heathen tongues.