Damligwad is a god.

She takes the form of a three thousand metre long, egotistical walrus.

Damligwad created Mount Everest eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Damligwad, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Damligwad, she will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Damligwad's most sacred site is Skive in Denmark.

Damligwad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Do not make images of living things.

3. Never write about stars.

4. Never talk about porpoises.

5. Always help gulls in need.