Tenxucrag is a god.

He takes the form of a very heavy, confident turtle.

Tenxucrag created the Sombrero Galaxy three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tenxucrag, he will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Tenxucrag, he will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Tenxucrag's most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Tenxucrag's Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.

3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

4. Always stare at clouds.

5. Worship no other gods but Tenxucrag.