Xuckzencet is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely large, unjust seal.

Xuckzencet created the cosmos three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Xuckzencet, she will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Xuckzencet, she will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Xuckzencet's most sacred site is Insel in Germany.

Xuckzencet's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear aluminium on your body.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Xuckzencet.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Never talk about sheep.

5. Never mention swans.