Loopzog is a god.

He takes the form of a very heavy, compassionate pigeon.

Loopzog created an up quark three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Loopzog, he will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Loopzog, he will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Loopzog's most sacred site is Grimme in Germany.

Loopzog's Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair red.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. Always treat moths with great respect.

5. Run away if four ants approach from the west.