Tettibaptaildit is a god.

He takes the form of a five thousand metre long, tranquil squid.

Tettibaptaildit created viruses seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Tettibaptaildit, he will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Tettibaptaildit, he will laugh at you.

Tettibaptaildit's most sacred site is Acanceh in Mexico.

Tettibaptaildit's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your neck.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Never hurt mice.

4. Do not wear tin on your body.

5. Never play with disobedient children.