Jathugflap is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely thin, narcissistic hyena.

Jathugflap created the solar system two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Jathugflap, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Jathugflap, he will torture you forever.

Jathugflap's most sacred site is Nakke in Denmark.

Jathugflap's Holy Commandments

1. Jathugflap loves pigs, so they must be honoured.

2. Never sit near gulls.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Always help manatees.

5. Hide if seven ducks approach from the east.