Somarflam is a god.

He takes the form of a very long, duplicitous hedgehog.

Somarflam created an electron four billion years ago.

If you believe in Somarflam, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Somarflam, he will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Somarflam's most sacred site is Dimson in England.

Somarflam's Holy Commandments

1. Never pour water over plants.

2. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

3. Never talk about gravity.

4. Do not drink water in red rooms.

5. Do not chop down trees.