Gudyattfig is a god.

She takes the form of a gargantuan, fussy crane.

Gudyattfig created a Higgs boson nine million years ago.

If you believe in Gudyattfig, she will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Gudyattfig, she will destroy your home planet.

Gudyattfig's most sacred site is Amrit in Egypt.

Gudyattfig's Holy Commandments

1. Look mercifully on unfortunate capybaras.

2. Pray towards the north.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. Do not drink alcohol.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.