Cinjonbif is a god.

She takes the form of a plump, emotional lion.

Cinjonbif created snails five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cinjonbif, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Cinjonbif, she will not invite you to parties.

Cinjonbif's most sacred site is Brechfa in Wales.

Cinjonbif's Holy Commandments

1. Do not take Cinjonbif's name in vain.

2. Erect nine copper sculptures of Cinjonbif on top of important buildings.

3. Never talk about horses.

4. Hide if three foxes approach from the north.

5. Cinjonbif loves dogs, so they must be respected.