Batcedkin is a god.

She takes the form of a massive, happy dolphin.

Batcedkin created the Andromeda Galaxy three billion years ago.

If you believe in Batcedkin, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Batcedkin, she will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Batcedkin's most sacred site is Khwee in Botswana.

Batcedkin's Holy Commandments

1. Retreat if eight voles approach from the east.

2. Capybaras are not to be trusted.

3. Never mention birds.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of titanium.

5. Pray towards the north.