Dabtifqueeg is a god.

It takes the form of an enormous, bad-tempered unicorn.

Dabtifqueeg created the planet Saturn four years ago.

If you believe in Dabtifqueeg, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Dabtifqueeg, it will strike you with lightening.

Dabtifqueeg's most sacred site is Aimala in Finland.

Dabtifqueeg's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention ducks.

2. Never think about the strong nuclear force.

3. Always obey Dabtifqueeg's priests.

4. Do not eat corn.

5. Never hurt pigs.