Shavsitsidgovsadvogcan is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, emotional badger.

Shavsitsidgovsadvogcan created a strange quark two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Shavsitsidgovsadvogcan, she will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Shavsitsidgovsadvogcan, she will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Shavsitsidgovsadvogcan's most sacred site is Xtul in Mexico.

Shavsitsidgovsadvogcan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of carbon.

2. Run away from fawn pigs, for they are unholy.

3. Do not wear violet clothing.

4. Never think about the weak nuclear force.

5. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.