Yartcedrig is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely heavy, smart swan.

Yartcedrig created the Cigar Galaxy eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Yartcedrig, she will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Yartcedrig, she will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Yartcedrig's most sacred site is Quenstedt in Germany.

Yartcedrig's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no snakes in a room before entering it.

2. Always make sure there are no geese in a building before entering it.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Yartcedrig.

4. Always treat voles with great respect.

5. You must love Yartcedrig.