Dissbetved is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, selfish deer.

Dissbetved created an atom six billion years ago.

If you believe in Dissbetved, it will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Dissbetved, it will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Dissbetved's most sacred site is Troqueer in Scotland.

Dissbetved's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about black holes.

2. Always help sick turtles.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Dissbetved.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.