Nurtvidmut Betbestlag is a god.

She takes the form of a blubbery, confident camel.

Nurtvidmut Betbestlag created Asia seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Nurtvidmut Betbestlag, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Nurtvidmut Betbestlag, she will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Nurtvidmut Betbestlag's most sacred site is Daraina in Madagascar.

Nurtvidmut Betbestlag's Holy Commandments

1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

2. Never wear turquoise boots.

3. Never think about moons.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Nurtvidmut Betbestlag.

5. Do not wear gold on your body.