Likquatlabort is a god.

He takes the form of a massive, egotistical faun.

Likquatlabort created the universe four years ago.

If you believe in Likquatlabort, he will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Likquatlabort, he will turn you into a plant.

Likquatlabort's most sacred site is Mogonono in Botswana.

Likquatlabort's Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair violet.

2. Do not hurt capybaras.

3. Erect three aluminium sculptures of Likquatlabort on top of important buildings.

4. Never write about evolution by means of natural selection.

5. Run away if seven hamsters approach from the west.