Cibfedtab is a god.

She takes the form of a two thousand metre long, ill-tempered crab.

Cibfedtab created the solar system six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cibfedtab, she will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Cibfedtab, she will turn you into a hamster.

Cibfedtab's most sacred site is Daren in Wales.

Cibfedtab's Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat cucumbers.

2. Never think about asteroids.

3. Never paint your hands turquoise.

4. Always make sure there are no doves in a room before entering it.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.