Kip Hugyarttab is a god.

He takes the form of a very long, selfish beaver.

Kip Hugyarttab created a quark three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Kip Hugyarttab, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Kip Hugyarttab, he will send two she bears to sort you out.

Kip Hugyarttab's most sacred site is Cudillero in Spain.

Kip Hugyarttab's Holy Commandments

1. Do not hurt otters.

2. Never hurt rats.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

4. Do not wear iron on your body.

5. Erect four carbon sculptures of Kip Hugyarttab on top of important buildings.