Teensugrak is a god.

He takes the form of a galaxy-sized, irritating dragon.

Teensugrak created humanity seven million years ago.

If you believe in Teensugrak, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Teensugrak, he will not care at all.

Teensugrak's most sacred site is Turckheim in France.

Teensugrak's Holy Commandments

1. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

2. Never mention bats.

3. Never talk about gravity.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Always make a point of helping unfortunate monkeys.