Vinbassmap is a god.

She takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, two-faced turtle.

Vinbassmap created oxygen nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Vinbassmap, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Vinbassmap, she will turn you into a giant snail.

Vinbassmap's most sacred site is Basalorum in Sweden.

Vinbassmap's Holy Commandments

1. Do not cook food in pots.

2. Always make a point of helping unfortunate goats.

3. Do not chop down trees.

4. Never laugh in the presence of nematodes.

5. Do not stand on grass.