Veentinbastgessgab is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, unjust chinchilla.

Veentinbastgessgab created the Cigar Galaxy seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Veentinbastgessgab, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Veentinbastgessgab, he will curse you with boils.

Veentinbastgessgab's most sacred site is Cudillero in Spain.

Veentinbastgessgab's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion models of living things.

2. Never sing in holy places.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Do not dye your hair blue.

5. Do not chop down trees.