Dobvanbiss is a god.

She takes the form of a massive, awesome squid.

Dobvanbiss created the cosmos three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Dobvanbiss, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Dobvanbiss, she will send you a sign.

Dobvanbiss' most sacred site is Diebzig in Germany.

Dobvanbiss' Holy Commandments

1. Never think about amino acids.

2. Always help whales in need.

3. Do not dye your hair pink.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Always pray immersed in water.