Baffumstip is a god.

He takes the form of a six hundred metre long, loving alligator.

Baffumstip created the solar system two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Baffumstip, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Baffumstip, he will send you a sign.

Baffumstip's most sacred site is Vestfold in Norway.

Baffumstip's Holy Commandments

1. Snakes are not to be trusted.

2. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

4. Erect a large titanium sculpture of Baffumstip on top of all buildings.

5. Never go into gray rooms.