Rawlanratsat is a god.

He takes the form of a large, unselfish clam.

Rawlanratsat created a Higgs boson two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Rawlanratsat, he will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Rawlanratsat, he will turn you into a snail.

Rawlanratsat's most sacred site is Katballe in Denmark.

Rawlanratsat's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to music.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Never think ill of sick great tits.

4. Never talk about cell theory.

5. Always make a point of helping unfortunate porpoises.