Tinkenlogarn Linbogbodquambastdobvan is a god.

She takes the form of a very large, loving alligator.

Tinkenlogarn Linbogbodquambastdobvan created the Large Magellanic Cloud eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Tinkenlogarn Linbogbodquambastdobvan, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Tinkenlogarn Linbogbodquambastdobvan, she will turn you into a puffin.

Tinkenlogarn Linbogbodquambastdobvan's most sacred site is Aranganur in India.

Tinkenlogarn Linbogbodquambastdobvan's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Ants are not to be trusted.

3. Never write about the strong nuclear force.

4. Always treat hamsters with great respect.

5. Do not speak about lemons.