Wippagflis is a god.

It takes the form of a thin, unthoughtful hippopotamus.

Wippagflis created vertebrates two billion years ago.

If you believe in Wippagflis, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Wippagflis, it will curse you with boils.

Wippagflis' most sacred site is Kgope in Botswana.

Wippagflis' Holy Commandments

1. Erect seven titanium sculptures of Wippagflis on top of important buildings.

2. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

3. Do not chop down trees.

4. Do not speak about strawberries.

5. Do not dye your hair green.