Jangudarnyok Pakvingudmad is a god.

It takes the form of a very thin, loving squirrel.

Jangudarnyok Pakvingudmad created silver four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Jangudarnyok Pakvingudmad, it will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Jangudarnyok Pakvingudmad, it will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.

Jangudarnyok Pakvingudmad's most sacred site is Demsin in Germany.

Jangudarnyok Pakvingudmad's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about gravity.

2. Never think about the weak nuclear force.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Never paint your back red.

5. Never wear fawn trousers.