Hugsandgom is a god.

He takes the form of a corpulent, deceitful lobster.

Hugsandgom created gold six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Hugsandgom, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Hugsandgom, he will denounce you as a heretic.

Hugsandgom's most sacred site is Katteri in India.

Hugsandgom's Holy Commandments

1. Hugsandgom must be the most important thing in your life.

2. Never eat bread.

3. Do not eat bananas.

4. Never talk about fire.

5. Hugsandgom loves mice, so they must be respected.