Quimbossflis is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely small, amazing manatee.

Quimbossflis created dark matter two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Quimbossflis, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Quimbossflis, she will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Quimbossflis' most sacred site is Chilhac in France.

Quimbossflis' Holy Commandments

1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

2. Do not make images of living things.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Feed all hungry porpoises.