Somsogdagfom is a god.

It takes the form of a thin, irritating zebra.

Somsogdagfom created time and space twelve years ago.

If you believe in Somsogdagfom, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Somsogdagfom, it will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Somsogdagfom's most sacred site is Kgope in Botswana.

Somsogdagfom's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat melons.

2. Never go into fawn rooms.

3. Never sit in holy places.

4. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

5. Do not commit murder.