Jantofquill is a god.

He takes the form of a blubbery, awesome dragon.

Jantofquill created the world nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Jantofquill, he will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Jantofquill, he will make you grow a tail.

Jantofquill's most sacred site is Temmes in Finland.

Jantofquill's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Run away from orange aardvarks, for they are unholy.

3. Show mercy to disobedient children.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Never paint your face black.